I've been doing pretty good lately. We had been on a good money streak and my old scared feelings are starting to feel like they are going to come out. I'm trying hard to maintain my postiveness, but it's hard. It's definitely work to do this, but with the other aspects of my life where I've applied this positive way of thinking things have been good. I was having a rough patch with my job and since I've changed my way of thinking, things have been so much better. Ironically, in my part time job where I teach and things have always been great, things have been harder. I've been cut on classes and of course pay which really hurts.
I'm in the process of doing training of another college and I'm excited about it. I'm just praying that I'll pass this class that I have to take and that I'll be given plenty of classes to teach.
I guess I'm just tired and worn out and my emotions are getting the best of me.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Getting better
I can't believe it's been at least 2 weeks since I've written. I've been reading my The Secret app every day and trying to maintain the positiveness. Money-wise we had a little windfall, I got my refunds from cancelling my car warranties and they came in at a good time. But we also had some things that we needed to pay cash for. One of the dogs got sick and it felt good to be able to pay cash for the visit. I just made them a $400 dollar payment and I'm hopeful that we will be able to pay that card off. I'm still planning on going to sell at the flea market and hope to get rid of the tires that P has. I've decided that any money we raise at the flea market goes to pay off the tires (from the tire sale) and then to the vet card.
Every day when I wake up I tell myself that the day is going to be okay and I think that the big guy up there will take care of us. And by his grace I'm actually getting a tax refund this year!!
Now I have to maintain my great attitude and get things ready for my meeting on the 19th. I have to come up with a lesson to teach to these other instructors that I will be meeting. If all goes well I'll have to go through 4 weeks of training (no pay involved) and then if they like me I'll be offered a class. I hope I can pick up another teaching job.
Well I guess that's it for now, but I know I'll write soon. I feel so much better when I put my ideas down here.
Every day when I wake up I tell myself that the day is going to be okay and I think that the big guy up there will take care of us. And by his grace I'm actually getting a tax refund this year!!
Now I have to maintain my great attitude and get things ready for my meeting on the 19th. I have to come up with a lesson to teach to these other instructors that I will be meeting. If all goes well I'll have to go through 4 weeks of training (no pay involved) and then if they like me I'll be offered a class. I hope I can pick up another teaching job.
Well I guess that's it for now, but I know I'll write soon. I feel so much better when I put my ideas down here.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
A new beginning
A few weeks ago I started a blog and I now realize that all I did was talk about all the bad things that I was thinking about and afraid of. It finally hit me if I continue to let this fear get to me, then all the things that I am afraid of will just keep coming at me and I'll never be free of it. So I've decided that even though my original blog was still a baby, I didn't want to continue on that path and wanted a fresh start.
When I think about the things that scare me and my biggest fear is the amount of debt that P and I have acquired in the past year. I have to stop worrying about us not paying it off and thinking about how we ARE going to pay it off and how good it is going to feel when we get that monkey off our backs.
For months now P has been wanting me to read that book The Secret and when it was first brought up to me I tried to read it, but I just wasn't in the right frame of mind for it. I got the book yesterday at the library and while I'm barely into the second chapter, I feel like I've had a major breakthrough. In the last few months/weeks where I've begun to wallow in my fear all of these "bad" things have just been piling on top of me. At one point yesterday my fear was so strong that I couldn't breathe, it was suffocating me. And all it took was to start reading this book and really let what was being said sink in. What you put out to the universe is what you attract back to you. I've always been a pretty positive person, but the realities of being a home owner and engaged woman have sunk in and it's like WOW I'm an adult and I didn't know how to deal with it. So what I've been projecting out into the world is my fear -- it was so think you could cut it with a knife!
Last night after talking with P for a bit I decided that I don't want to be the victim anymore. I don't want to be paralyzed by this financial fear. I know that P and I can pay off the debt we have, it will take a little time and a lot of effort, but it is completely doable. I just have to keep that constantly in my mind and take a deep breathe when the bad thoughts start to creep in.
For me today is going to be the beginning of a new way of thinking. I'm hopeful and for the first time in weeks I feel like some of the burden that I've been carrying around is gone. It truly is amazing at what your thoughts can do.
When I think about the things that scare me and my biggest fear is the amount of debt that P and I have acquired in the past year. I have to stop worrying about us not paying it off and thinking about how we ARE going to pay it off and how good it is going to feel when we get that monkey off our backs.
For months now P has been wanting me to read that book The Secret and when it was first brought up to me I tried to read it, but I just wasn't in the right frame of mind for it. I got the book yesterday at the library and while I'm barely into the second chapter, I feel like I've had a major breakthrough. In the last few months/weeks where I've begun to wallow in my fear all of these "bad" things have just been piling on top of me. At one point yesterday my fear was so strong that I couldn't breathe, it was suffocating me. And all it took was to start reading this book and really let what was being said sink in. What you put out to the universe is what you attract back to you. I've always been a pretty positive person, but the realities of being a home owner and engaged woman have sunk in and it's like WOW I'm an adult and I didn't know how to deal with it. So what I've been projecting out into the world is my fear -- it was so think you could cut it with a knife!
Last night after talking with P for a bit I decided that I don't want to be the victim anymore. I don't want to be paralyzed by this financial fear. I know that P and I can pay off the debt we have, it will take a little time and a lot of effort, but it is completely doable. I just have to keep that constantly in my mind and take a deep breathe when the bad thoughts start to creep in.
For me today is going to be the beginning of a new way of thinking. I'm hopeful and for the first time in weeks I feel like some of the burden that I've been carrying around is gone. It truly is amazing at what your thoughts can do.
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